Often when i hear about enlightenment or the ultimate freedom as the people describe it I get deep into my thoughts and analysis about this state. What is it actually? How can one get totally free? Is it also for me? can i possibly someday become enlightened?... and many more questions i keep on asking myself.
I remember a story when Guruji was telling about a soldier who got enlightened when a bullet hit him in his neck and he got enlightened and thus justifying that its takes more time to pluck a flower than to get enlightened.
It was a satsang evening in vishalakshi. I was sitting quitely near the east-facing door.People were singing and dancing all around . For the first time in satsang i was unable to enjoy as my mind was stuck with some tension. Something that i could not overcome even after trying hard. And even that time i asked myself the same question 'my life would never be free from these situations how can i experience the freedom ? '. After sitting there for about 20 minutes i decided to forget everything and join the dance group in left corner. I went there and joined hands with the circle.
I didn't realize that the place i was standing on was corner of the stair.As soon as i took my first step forward for dance i fell down and hurt my right leg badly. It was so much pain. A few people helped me in getting up and made me sit on some other place. It was hurting like anything.
But at the same moment a thought came in my mind 'this would continue happening till when are you going to wait?'. I got up to dance again. The army doctor who helped me previously told me to take rest and told him "nothing can prevent me from dancing today! not atleast this".
This incidence made me so clear about the relation of pain and suffering. I had a lot of pain but i didn't suffer. Guruji has his own ways to teach and he taught me.
Next morning when my mother came to meet me she couldn't take the way i was. My ankle had a swelling like anything. She applied some moov and told me it would take at least a week to recover. I didn't bother as nothing could bother me after the night's incidence. I went to vishalakshi for doing my kriya. There was a little pain while sitting in vajrasan but as i went on the pain was slowly vanishing. i had a good kriya. And when i opened my eyes to my surprize the swelling was gone. There was a very little pain left.
There were no limits to my happiness.
And from that day i had grown such a faith on my guru that he is there... always.
Jai Guru Dev!
